Ambigiuity

It reaches a point in your life when you just stop caring. So many things bug you but you’re won out of worry. Nothing makes sense any more. So much that you do what you do because it's what you do. If you don't continue doing it, then you're basically doing nothing and anything is better than nothing. You justify your doings by all means so much that it begins to make sense. Well at least you think it does but it really doesn't. Eventually you’re just doing something to justify the nothing.

 So is life, a wonder in itself. I no longer feel the need to justify anything, maybe because I lack the justification, maybe because if I justified it, it would be meaningless and what's the something worth doing if it's meaningless. It's even worrying to think about because to think about it means to justify it while really, there’s nothing to it. I know that some things don’t make sense, but then again...neither does life.

Then again, what's a life lived without meaning? Better to justify it, even if it's nothing in order to define the nothing by calling it something. I haven't said something in a while because of the nothingness that lacks justification. Even if I justified it, it wouldn't make sense, though sometimes some things are best said when they don't make sense. When they don’t make sense to other people but they make sense to you. The same way some things we will never know but God knows and that's enough.