Sunday, July 29, 2012

What I look for in a relationship.

A lot of people keep asking me the same questions like, "Why I am single? What's my type?" and I'll just go ahead and give you some of those reasons and answers:

1. Date Someone who adds Value to your life.

I need someone that I don't have to lower my standards to be with but will help me raise my standards instead. I should be climbing the ladder upwards not downwards. I need progress in my life. So I check his status qua, does it match my lifestyle? Can he be able to do the things I've always done and does he fit in comfortably in my life? Many people talk about how money doesn't matter but to me it does. I'm not saying be a gold digger, I just don't settle down for someone that I know wont provide for me because a man is suppose to be able to provide. Somehow I always end up being the one who pays all the bills in a relationship and also the one doing all the providing, I don't like it. I need a man who will be able to take care of me. At least a man who makes himself feel needed or is good for something by contributing into my life. If you can't even treat me out to lunch and afford a plate for yourself, leave alone me... what value are you really adding to my life? So you bought me a soda cause that's all you could afford, I have sodas at home. In that case I'm not really impressed, so hell yes I am better off without you. In my head I already know I'm way out of your league and I don't want you to strain yourself to satisfy me.

2. Seriously? Your addicted to drinking, Smoking and you're always high!?

How can I take someone like that seriously? I'll be honest right now, if you are addicted to any of those I mentioned, I just can't see myself with you. I need someone who can get their act together. I really don't need to string along this kind of person around me that influences me negatively. These are usually the type of people I run away from the most. Yes I drink occasionally but to be honest if you fall on this category, know your on the bottom of my list because I don't want to become an addict like you.

3. Religious Views:

I am a religious person, so one of the things that don't automatically work for me is if you tell me you don't believe in God. One of the things that ruin relationships are when you and your partner do not have the same views or anything in common. For me this is a big one! I need someone who can help me grow spiritually, be  my mentor and not take me away from my God.

4. Someone who compliments me:

Chivalry isn't dead! I need a man who courts me and tells me how he really feels. A guy who's not afraid to share his thoughts with me. Tell me how he feels, be open! Besides, how else can a relationship survive without communication. A guy who appreciates me and makes it known gives me all the reassurance a girl needs. So do it all the time, keep it constant, keep those compliments coming! I'll never get tired of hearing I look good cause I'm someone who likes to look good anyway. I wears my perfume, do my hair and nails...
this tells me that you appreciate and notice my daily efforts to impress. And not only I should look good, I also need my man to be on top of his game. For example, I do my daily workouts, he also needs to keep up with his shape. A guy who smells good is such a turn on for me, so yeah! A man who knows how to take care of himself can definitely roll with me! I want to know and hear we look good together and that we also compliment each other well when we're together!

5. Emotional stability and support:

I like giving advice to people so I don't mind listening to what people have to tell me. Even so I can't be with you if you have too many problems going on in your life and you're not emotionally stable. I also keep off if you can't control yourself around people when something nerve wrecking happens. These are the type of people I fear might turn on me and hit me one day. I'm against any abusive relationships and I try to pick up on the early signs. Call me paranoid, but I'd better be safe than sorry. I like people who are easy to talk to and advice me on the little things in life and are honest with their opinions. Someone who if I get stuck or hit a mental block, will help me move forward. All in all someone who can also be my best friend and who you know you can count on to be there for you when you need them.

Usually I ask people in relationships, "Do you see yourself spending the rest of your life with your current partner?" they usually say no. The way I see it is that I don't want to say no when I'm asked that question. I always know when I can't see myself spending the rest of my life with someone and in such cases I don't bother being with that person. There's no need for a tainted heart when you know a relationship wont last. I usually don't take people for joy rides... I make it count! 

All in all I want someone who will build me up physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually! Now that's what I really look for in a man if you ask me!