Wednesday, July 17, 2013


I came across this post and I remembered my past years having lived in America as an African hanging around African Americans. I feel like I totally can relate what Bill Cosby is saying. I was doing Biology at the time and was also one of the few blacks at my college. We all knew each other because we were not so many. My sister and I were practically the only Kenyans at the time in the college, that they nick named us 'Kenyans' 1 and 2. I was accustomed to the name. 

In my biology class, I was one of the only 3 blacks. The rest of the two were Haitians and we would joke about it, or wonder why they weren't that many African Americans interested in becoming doctors or the likes, or even who took education as a whole seriously. Most of the ones I knew in the college would drop out or get transferred elsewhere to try better their grades. 

A lot of my African American friends, well the few that were in college (mostly girls) struggled to maintain their GPA. I never thought it were possible to see anything below a 2.0 GPA or worse, but they were many. As for the guys we had them all in the basketball team on scholarships. When I sat with them in some of my core curriculum classes it was hard to believe how they even made it that far. Some of them were having a hard time reading general English, let alone surviving the class. It honestly came as a surprise to me.

A lot of my friends found it hard to believe that I was one out of 6 children in my family and that we all shared the same parents. Apparently its highly likely that it ever happens, considering that I'm from African descent. I would tell them that I know a whole lot of black folks that share the same. Unfortunately I can't say the same about African Americans. 

I was all about wanting the blacks to do better as a race. To show a better side of our people, talked about this a couple of times with my close Haitian friend that felt the same way. Mainly because I knew we ought to do better for ourselves, especially for our future generation. 


They're standing on the corner and they can't speak English.
I can't even talk the way these people talk:
Why you ain't,
Where you is,
What he drive,
Where he stay,
Where he work,
Who you be...
And I blamed the kid until I heard the mother talk.
And then I heard the father talk.
Everybody knows it's important to speak English except these knuckleheads. You can't be a doctor with that kind of crap coming out of your mouth. 
In fact you will never get any kind of job making a decent living.

People marched and were hit in the face with rocks to get an Education, and now we've got these Knuckleheads walking around.
The lower economic people are not holding up their end in this deal.
These people are not pretending. They are buying things for kids.
$500 sneakers for what?
And they won't spend $200 for Hooked on Phonics.

I am talking about these people who cry when their son is standing there in an orange suit.
Where were you when he was 2?
Where were you when he was 12?
Where were you when he was 18 and how come you didn't know that he had a pistol?
And where is the father? Or who is his father?
People  putting their clothes on backwards:
Isn't that a sign of something gone wrong?
People with their hats on backward, pants down around the crack, isn't that a sign of something?

Isn't it a sign of something when she has he dress all the way up and got all types of needles [piercings] going through her body?
What part of Africa did this come from??
We are not Africans. Those people are not Africans; they don't know a thing about Africa....

I say this all of the time. It would be like white people saying they are European-American. That is totally stupid. I was born here, and so were my parents and grand parents and, very likely my great grandparents. I don't gave any connection to Africa, no more than white Americans have to Germany, Scotland, England, Ireland, or the Netherlands. The same applies to 99 percent of all the black Americans as regards to Africa. So stop already!!! 
With names like Shaniqua, Taliqua and Mohammed and all of that crap ......... And all of them are in jail. 

Brown or black versus the Board of Education is no longer the white person's problem.
We have got to take the neighborhood back.
People used to be ashamed. Today a woman has eight children with eight different 'husbands' -- or men or whatever you call them now.
We have millionaire football players who cannot read.
We have million-dollar basketball players who can't write two paragraphs. We, as black folks have to do a better job.
Someone working at Wal-Mart with seven kids, you are hurting us.
We have to start holding each other to a higher standard..
We cannot blame the white people any longer.'

~Dr.. William Henry 'Bill' Cosby, Jr., Ed..D.

It's NOT about color...
It's about behavior!!!
We ought to do better!

Thursday, July 11, 2013


One of my paintings

Sometimes I wanna CRY!!!

Cry for my uncertainties... Cry because I miss my past life... Cry because I'm not content about my future... Cry because I want better... Cry because I'm hurting... Cry because I'm happy or cause am sad... Yeah, Sometimes I just want to cry for no reason and not be asked or have to feel the need to explain myself.

I keep looking back at my pictures, looking back at all the opportunities I had around me and end up disappointed at myself for the little I made of them.

I can't fathom some of the choices I made at some points in my life, and why they led me to where I am now in my life. Are they relevant?

I try make points, draw dots of the different challenges of my life and hope that maybe one day they'll make sense. Maybe when I am where I'm meant to be, I'll truly believe it. I hope that that day I'll be able to sit back and look at the dots and draw the line that connects the dots.

Why go through so much hurt, go through so many irrelevant paths if they all don't add up? Is it necessary? Especially when you're at a point where you don't understand any of it.

Are we all taught life lessons and we refuse to learn from them? If we are, why isn't it ever obvious? Why can't we just have the answers so we don't stress? So that we can avoid all the extra heart ache that we don't need.

Right now I'm looking at all my possibilities. No they still don't make sense. Hopefully one day they will. I pray it will all come to me, and that it will all make sense. Until then, I cry and hope one day, all this tears will have meant something.

If I ever cry then, when I finally realize it all. I hope it will only be tears of joy, because I'll be happy. Because I'll have conquered. Because it was all worth it. I cry.